Big Russ: Road to Redemption
Big Russ summoned all their strength in week 10, and beat the Ball Busters of Brotherly Love: 90 to 80. Keys to Big Russ' HIGE victory: Muhsin Muhammad's 30 points. "Never did I think a victory would have relied so heavily on a Carolina Panther. If I knew my season would have depended on Muhammad this year, I think I wouldn't have played..."

What happened to Big Ben? The Ball Busters newest franchise player, rookie QB Ben Roethlisberger, totally fell apart in week 10. Big Ben (as he's known to Ball Busters owner Rich Frank) only earned 4 points on 134 yards and a fumble.

Trunk Monkeys: Penetrated by the Boners
Playing back to form, Daunte Culpepper wondered, "What the hell happened?!?" Culpepper's 38 points was much closer to normal, thus allowing the Trunk Monkeys to continue on the road to domination. But, the rest of the Trunk Monkey team failed to show-up. Not one other Trunk Monkey posted a score in the double-digits. What a suck!

The Smokin' Bonecrushers, on the other hand, countered with a Favre-like performance of 35 points and three other players in double-digits. Maybe Wheeler just wanted it more. With that, Wheeler hasn't clichéd jack shit. The only thing that Wheeler has guaranteed is that he won't lose a playoff spot to me, but he can still lose one to Long Eared Loungers - the Dark Horse of the league...

Tie Goes to the Historian
In the first tie game of the year, LZ Historians emerge out on top. It was the 262 passing yards from Marc Bulger that did it - compared to the meager 233 yards from Tom Brady. Going into Monday night, G-Man had a healthy advantage. Then add Terrell Owens. T.O. earned 33 points and pushed LZ into a position where the game was won.

G-Man, you could have won the game, and helped my playoff dreams. What the hell happened? I'm sure you're going to second-guess yourself for this one - let me help. Vinny Testaverde would have won the game for you.

Long Eared Loungers Still Winning
Long Eared Loungers continued their winning ways in week 10 against The Drunken Punks. Amassing a score of 82 was not the winningest thing to have happened to the Loungers (currently holding the league's longest winning streak (3)), it was all about the poor Punk performance.

The Drunken Punks turned-in the lowest score of the week: 72. Check-out the crap score of David Carr (4 points) and you'll know what I mean. Better muscle-up against G-Man for week 11 - he's pissed about losing the tie, and he wants revenge...

Goons Win a Close One, Plus $5
With a score of 111, Fast Eddie's Hired Goons have claimed a win and the week 10 five dollar bill. "The best thing is that it only took three players: Donovan McNabb, 41 points; Joe Horn, 22 points; and the Pittsburgh Defense, 24 points. This was my easiest win of the year!" said Fast Eddie himself.

"Friggin' Payton Manning! He's good enough for 44 points, but not for 46? What kind of shit is that?" ranted Kama Sutra Kobras owner, Troy Snethen.

Fast Eddie: your days are numbered (4)

 

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